Conscious Thinking
It takes
a bit of energy and focus, but conscious thinking can have a profound effect on
your life and those around you. Deliberately being conscious of your mental and
physical states throughout your day helps us break out from auto pilot.
I have
two specific things that I do for my mind and body to help positively program
myself.
1. 1) randomly dance or do exercises anytime/anywhere if I feel the need to mentally
or physically get in touch. Simple ballet exercises
in my kitchen using a counter as a barre or dropping down to the floor and
doing push ups or burpees. 2) For
the mind I often take breaks by practicing ‘pause moments’ or deliberately
doing and/or thinking things that help program me to be grateful.
Interestingly,
while reading various news feeds on line today I came across an article on
Huffington Post that listed several things one can do to increase their
potential to be happy. You can read the whole article ’12 Things Happy People
Do Differently’ at http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jacob-sokol-/things-happy-people-do_b_3869793.html Of course, a lot of these are common sense and
many of us already practice them frequently, but it is always good to be
reminded.
My Commentary on the List of 12
Things to be a Happier Person:
1. Express gratitude. – making a conscious effort to acknowledge everything
you have good in your life by either telling those people or making a list is a
step in the positive direction.
2. Cultivate optimism. – The power of positive thinking is what comes to mind when
I read this phrase, but a step further by taking action steps to actually
cultivate the positive.
3. Avoid over-thinking and social comparison. – I’m guilty of this on so many levels. I’m
an over-thinker for sure. What’s the hardest for me to kick is comparing my 50+
year old athletic self to my younger athletic self. I NEED to give myself a
break, be kinder to myself, and allow myself to be the healthiest ME at this
point in my life. Be your best self and don’t strive for perfection. We are
human and attaining perfection is unrealistic and unhealthy.
4. Practice acts of kindness. – doing things for others without any thought of what’s in
it for you has a beneficial effect. Doing things for others really does make us
feel better about ourselves because we feel fulfilled and useful helping
others. Do some volunteer work, help a friend, neighbor or family member and
see for yourself.
5. Nurture social relationships. – ALL relationships need nurturing, including marriages. Don’t
take any relationship for granted. It’s important to put time and attention
into your various relationships so they continue to grow and flourish.
6. Develop strategies for coping. – We are not in control of many things in life. Life is full
of change and unpredictability. Although there are many things we are not in
control of in our daily lives, we ARE IN CONTROL of how WE REACT to those
difficult events. My mom used to say that experiences in life are all ‘character
building.’ The important thing is to develop healthy coping mechanisms. So
count to ten, think before you speak/react, and practice healthy stress
reducing exercises to blow off steam. Physical exercise does wonders to make
one feel mentally and physically better.
7. Learn to forgive. – is a tough one. As a survivor of child abuse, it’s tough
for me to easily forgive someone who does me wrong, and my natural inclination
isn’t to give second chances. However, I’ve learned that to heal and be a
healthy person, I need to find ways to work through the wrong done to me and
come to peace with it on my own, and let go. I find it to be amazingly
uplifting mentally which also reduces my physical stress because I’m not ‘carrying
baggage.’
8. Increase flow experiences. – This one can be hard to explain. I and others I know who
are ADD have a tendency to actually hyper focus on a task to the detriment of
other things. So temperance is key. The definition of “flow” is - a state in
which it feels like time is standing still. One is so focused on what they are doing
that they become “one with the task.” You're not hungry, sleepy, or emotional -
you're just completely engaged in the activity that you're doing. NOTE: many adults have super busy lives and having
freedom to experience these engrossing escapism moments can be challenging.
9. Savor life's joys. – I call this “Practicing Pause Moments.” Have you heard the
expression, “stop and smell the roses?”
We have to slow down and savor the moments while they are happening. This
is a prime example of practicing conscious thinking.
10. Commit to your goals. – Making a conscious effort to fully commit to accomplishing
a goal that you set, telling yourself there is no turning back or changing your
mind. Fully committing to a goal provides a sense of purpose which in itself
makes us happier. It’s a form of exercising control in your life.
11. Practice spirituality. – Yes I know not everyone is spiritual. Some equate
spirituality with religion, but one can be spiritual and not religious.
Practice whichever one that fits you best. The concept is to realize that we
are a very small dot in life and in the world. A good example for me is
connecting to nature (air, water, trees, animals, plants etc.) Finding a
connection may help you figure out what you are called to do in this life.
12. Take care of your body. – Have you ever heard the expression “The body is a temple?”
There is a strong mind body connection that has been proven in science and
medicine. Being the healthiest, most fit person you are capable of becoming will
put you in a good position to have mental staying power which will keep your
mind and emotions elevated towards feeling good, positive, and happy. Exercise has been found to provide an
increase in ‘happiness levels’ equal to that of taking an anti-depressant.**